The Progression of Life

It is a strange experience the first time one is invited to a wedding as an individual and not as a member of a family of invitees or just another member of the family at a family wedding. It gives the individual a feeling of self-worth, that they as an individual is valued enough to be invited the grand event that is a wedding. To me, it gives me a feeling of stepping up in life, almost as if being promoted to a higher position in the progression of life. To not be limited by my family or my parents, to be able to accept a wedding invitation and say "I'll be there" without having to ask for permission first. It is, in every way, a step into adulthood and all that comes with it. I find the idea quite freeing and it fills me with a sensation of progress.

I have not often felt like an adult, but rather as an elderly child with benefits. So this new sensation is just that, new. It begs the question of when do children become adults? Is it a simple matter of age? Does a child once he has reached an age become an adult, and if so what age? As a child growing up I always saw eighteen years of age as the mark at which adulthood begins, when childhood innocence is left behind and replaced with the eyes of the world. Instead, at eighteen I found myself doubting in this as I found myself feeling more a child still than an adult. Rather then, does a child become an adult once they reach a level of maturity instead? This is perhaps how the world views adulthood, what with it's increasingly high number of "kidults", the many adults who, while looking like adults, act more like children. If maturity counted then children as young as twelve could be consider adults. I have met many young individual who boasted far more maturity than I have ever had, but for the sake of their age and size, they would never be considered adults by it. Thus we come to an impasse. What is left to judge adulthood by? Personal experience? Facial hair? Wrinkles?

I think it comes down more vitally to how a person if viewed and treated. If a young person is treated as an adult than he would likely respond as an adult. Treat the same young person as a child and they will likely act the part. It is entirely possible for the young person to step above this lowered bar of childishness that has been presented to them and soar to the level of adulthood by impressing those who can already call themselves "adults" with ease of mind. But so few take the initiative or strive to do hard things. Instead, most are willing to accept the lowered bar and coast through life instead. These are the "kidults", men and women who while ever ripening in years remain at that bar that has been presented to them.

And this bar is, admittedly, at ground level.

I personally believe that adulthood should be something perhaps not gained at the ideal age of eighteen, but rather thrust upon the shoulders of the youths. Even if their actions are not "adultish" they would still have a title to live up to and be held accountable to. To give them room to breath and a space to grow into. If if give them a high expectation it is possible that they might just meet it or come close rather then giving them a low expectation and being satisfied when they meet it perfectly. When I see a person who is eighteen or older, I think of them as an adult, and as an adult they should be able to do adult things, like paying their rent, taxes, car payments, and scheduling their own life, managing their transportation, and ultimately working a job to make all the above possible to begin with. When I see an adult young person who does not, or cannot, do any of those I see a great travesty and a perfect example of youths meeting the level expected of them.

Am I an adult? Am I worthy of the title? Do I soar above the bar or do I sink below the floor? These are questions we should all ask ourselves. I ask myself them daily, and sometimes I am shocked at the obvious answers. Sometimes we have to fight for change, to rise above what is expected and "do hard things" as the Harris twins, Bret and Alex, so adamantly proclaim.